Phone Groan

Hello, everyone. Yeah, I’m still working at the grocery store. Necessity or insanity, I’m not sure which.

A lady walked up to my cash talking on her cell phone. Well, you should all realize by now this behaviour drives me batty. It’s beyond bad mannered.


I ask her if she would like a bag and I get completely ignored.

I repeated myself…

“Ma’am, would you like a bag?” (Insert noise of crickets chirping)

So I started shoving everything in bags anyway.

“Ma’am, how would you like to pay? With credit, debit or cash? Ma’am…Hello?”

Then she has the audacity to lift her hand in front of my face and wave it like the Queen, making grunting noises as if to say I’m disturbing her phone call. “Oourgh, oourgh, oourgh!”

Seriously? She’s ruffling my dander. Okay, now I’m starting to get pissed off. I get ornery when I’m pissed off. This means war.

So then I started talking. “How many bags would you like? How would you like to pay? Debit, credit, or cash? Cold weather isn’t it? Boy, be careful you don’t get a sore neck holding your phone like that! Would you like me to put a produce bag on your meat? Those cookies are a really good price, aren’t they? We have a lot of things on sale today. Well, thanks for the attentive conversation. You have a really nice day now!”

She didn’t look impressed but too fucking bad. She shouldn’t be so rude. Grunting is not a conversation. If your addiction to your phone is that bad, get help.

It’s my biggest pet peeve. If you do this, stop it.

Everyone knows I like to sing…

You could while away the hours
Conferrin’ with cell towers
Consultin’, rude, insane

And your head, you’d be scratchin’
While your thoughts were busy hatchin’
If you only had a brain.


Admit it, you just sang this song. Hahaha!

Honestly, get off your fucking phone~

Story of my life…


18 thoughts on “Phone Groan

  1. I almost got into a fight at Hobby Lobby.

    I was minding my own beeswax perusing the galvanized goodies when my shopping tranquillity was rudely interrupted by a ‘lady’ blabbing on her cellphone….ON SPEAKER!

    I walked up to her and started to ask her, politely, to keep her conversation between her and her friend and leave me out of it. BUT NO! Before I could get a word in she put her hand up, and said, “I am on the PHONE!”

    I said: “I know! We all know!!! I know all about your friends trip to Catalina!!!’ I know about all the stuff she needs to do. I know about your mundane nonsense, AND I DO T WANT TO!

    Further more, I explained that my deaf husband loves speakerphone and I lovingly told him if he continues to use speakerphone around me I WILL KILL HIM, so you lady, better watch yourself, I don’t know or like you.


    Liked by 4 people

  2. Uhh!! That is the worst, I’m so lucky because I have no filter and I am to honest when it comes to imprudent people. I love the random questions to interrupt the phone call though, that was classic😁. Un tape the phone from the head for one second people!!!

    Liked by 1 person

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