Pussy Perfume

I watched a show on Netflix called Empire of Scents. Well, I must say it was somewhat of an eye opener. The sense of smell is a very powerful thing.

There is a perfume called Vulva Original which is supposed to smell like the scent of a beautiful woman. They went around taking samples of women’s vulvas, and then picked the one they felt smelled the best. It’s been out for a couple of years, but I didn’t know about it. It got mixed reviews. Some men loved it, some said it smelled like horse piss.

I just wonder when they’re going to come out with an ‘Ode De Penis scent for women?

Imagine, making an aphrodisiac perfume out of your own vaginal secretions to attract men. Is this the new secret weapon for women? Mix some snatch juice with a few essential oils and voila! I have taken a few essential oil mixing classes at my local crystal shop over the past couple of years. Unfortunately though, body fluids and sweat become unstable and don’t do well in mixtures.

Damn! No pheromone potions? Ah, there goes my chances of being the next GW Potter.

Ummm…

So what is the solution? Well, you just stick your finger into the dark abyss (you know, down there), and dab it onto your pulse points. (wrists, behind the ears and cleavage), and then go out on your date and win yourself the man of your dreams. Apparently, this used to be a thing in Medieval Europe. It drives men wild.

Yes, this may seem fucking disgusting but I have read that this works to take your romantic relationships to the next level.

Will I be doing this? No. I don’t date anymore. However, one of my readers may want to take it on as their next science experiment to spruce up a boring weekend.

See what happens when I’m left alone at home? Ha!

In other news, I’m still trying to get over my cold. I have to go back to work tonight. It’s going to be rough.

~GW